... up against the wall when the revolution comes

Option Explicit

DoCmd.SetWarnings False

Dim jakejake as String

jakejake = “m*f”

DoCmd.RunSQL “Update revolution set wall = true where motherfucker is not null”

DoCmd.SetWarnings True

.

When I got married for the second time, it was in an urban church. One of the guests was a homeless person who wandered in from the street. Had we known of his presence, we would have extended him an invitation to the reception.

I hope that when I die, someone will put out a sign like this beckoning passers by to come and mourn the death of someone unknown,

Crosstown Traffic

This vehicle adds to my carbon footprint.

When it rains

I am drinking beer in the morning at a Mexican cantina and wondering if Christ was a virgin.

Not soon enough

A whole bunch of m*fs who will be up against the wall when the revolution comes.

Inappropriately named mountain

The revolution will be cold.

There be coyotes here

Behind this fence is grass, then a thick wall of brush and trees. Beyond that lies a misnamed creek, The water of the creek contains the effluent from several sanitary treatment facilities.

Hi, my name is Ralph

The thing about cats is that, despite what we have, cats have a finite number of souls. They all wander up and down a kind of feline version of the spiral of life. Kittens who master all facets of cattiness can slowly advance to the top where they are reincarnated as jungle cats. The truly pious then are reborn in feral litters across urbanized areas.

They remember their past lives. This particular cat observed a civil war battle and feasted upon dead bodies washed along the shore after the defeat of the Spanish Armada.

This is also why so called psychic people like having cats around. When they get a few, they create a kind of psychic energy that makes people think they can read fortunes by reading hairballs.

Upward bound

 

Beneath the dappled carpet was a wood stair
set gently by a man with a hammer
holding nails in his teeth ready to fasten
several strips of wood that
were grown close together with the rude intention
by being laid about crossways
and nailed
as if
christ.

Reinheitsgebot

This is what happens when you give beer to a baby. It can be very dangerous, so it's important to understand the full process. For example--it's important to gradually introduce alcohol into a baby's bottle by allowing apple juice to ferment for a few days. Once the child has been able to grasp the concept of buzz, then you can introduce them to some of the softer regional lagers. It's important to keep little girls from tasting the bitter beers such as german lagers or pale ales as this tends to lead them down the primrose path of debauchery into cultural deviance. The application of underwear to the head as illustrated above is an early indicator of this malaise.

As a side note, it is much easier changing diapers when one is drunk.